Monday, November 02, 2009

Wedding Invitation Etiquette

Some of the fun rules I've learned about wedding invitations thus far:

  • Hand addressed invitations are traditional and preferred over printed labels
  • Better than saying 'no children,' one should say 'adult reception'
  • Always put a postage stamp on your Response card or envelope so people can drop it straight in the mail
  • If it is a religious ceremony, you ask for the 'honor' of their attendance. If it is not, you ask for the 'pleasure' of their attendance
  • Do not mention gifts in your wedding invitation. Apparently this is the ultimate faux pas. As one site said, 'it is a wedding invitation, not a request for gifts.' So the Muslim trend of saying 'no boxed gifts' is apparently out
  • Be careful about sending out 'save the date' cards, as you are obligated to send an invitation to whoever gets one of those
Additional information at: Weddings
More wedding planning adventures to come...


Yasmeen Noor said...

You are kidding me. Are you seriously posting things on wedding etiquette?! You make me laugh. :)

PS It's worth noting that rules of social etiquette for different cultures don't necessarily, and don't have to, apply to the desi/Arab/Muslim fob crowd. :)

Suwila said...

hmmmm no mention of gifts on an invitation card? i agree with Yasmeen, there is a difference in social etiquette for different cultures. like the 'no boxed gifts' note, if you don't mention it on the invitation would anyone know? there's some things that may not necessarily be 'good invitation etiquette', but possibly necessary :) a necessary bid'ah (innovation)!! j/k.

Fatin said...

I agree with the above two comments especially the gifting part. Honestly, I have a friend who didn't specify and she really got everything under the sun, I asked her later about it she said they wanted monetary gifts but I guess people didn't know. Even if you do specify you will still get stuff that you might not need. One of my friends had a registry and she said she got many gifts that were not part of the registry and she didn't know what to do with them becasue she can't return them :) Hope this helps.

Angie said...

seriously. if you don't say no boxed gifts you will get the biggest pile of useless knick knacks under the sun. it's definitely worth it since it is a Muslim wedding cultural norm. Like fatin said, even after specifying and even mentioning a registry you still get loads of stuff you don't need or use... and since Im totally against having extra stuff you don't need, I would 110% recommend that you mention no boxed gifts on the invite!!

Saira said...

totally with all the comments regarding no boxed gifts. I am curious as to what would be 'good etiquette' in discussing gifts.

i think for our walimah cards we included an extra little papery type thing that said something about how the couple is moving and no boxed gifts etc.

Naba said...

I think if you're moving, you live somewhere not close to the reception, you're moving in with your in-laws, etc. you should specify something.

Someone I know had 700+ guests at their wedding and didn't specify anything. Can you imagine the logistics of transporting hundreds of gifts? Even if you live down the block, there are so many other things you have to worry about.

zai5h said...

Something to add to your list might be the language on the RSVP card that clearly indicates how many people in the family are invited. I think it was something like "___ seats have been reserved in your name" or something like that. I thought that was a nice way to limit the #s.